lets talk about sex pt 3

I go on tinder a lot. I have met up with quite a few guys from tinder and I have hooked up with most of them. I like tinder because I am about to graduate from an all girls school and I don’t know many guys. I know being on tinder is somewhat groundupon. I was on tinder when I was 15 I lied about my age and hooked up with a lot of guys. i had sex w a 19 year old when i was 16 and blew a 21 year old when I was 16. I always wanted attention from guys and I didn’t care how I got it. I never felt like I was enough so i always figured the only attention I was going to et was the negative kind from guys that i actually didn’t care too much about. I now recently started talking to  a guy who has never kissed a girl. I really like him but i wonder how can he like me if I am so much more experienced than him. He too is 18 and come from a strict hindu family. He doesn’t want to kiss a girl until he is in love. I have already have a had sex but I really like him but I can’t have a relationship with no kissing. So i flirt but nothing happens. I wish I never had sex so I could feel less awkward about having so much experience.



life a poem 

Life has caused me to expect the worst 

and hope for the best.

 I was born an optimist

 life has given me pesimism 

and I came out a realist 

with hope.

 I’ve been living this life 

trying to find myself in others,

 I looked every direction except inward 

and I finally have started growing 

in every way.

 I’m not popular,

I’m not fake, 

I’m not busy on the weekends,

 I don’t go to parties,

 I don’t text every second, I 

don’t judge my self or others as harshly, 

I’m trying to change for the better

.’m following my passion. 

I’m living in my feelings and emotions.

 I’m chasing my dreams

and following my gut feelings. 

The saddness that I have been in 

has brought me to be more comfortable with myself 

and realize I am great 

and I will NEVER settle again

 I am me 

and I don’t know exactly who that is yet, 

but I’m excited to see.